Mariah Carey's worst career move ever
Some people just don't know when to quit. Last fall, Mariah Carey released Memoirs of an Imperfect Angel, which, clunky title aside, was my favorite pop album of 2009, and certainly the best of her career. But no one was listening. Like its 2008 predecessor, E=MC2, it produced only one hit single and didn't stick around the tops of the pops for long.
Carey's solution: Repackage the album as remixes and duets, add a few new songs (including some Timbaland-produced tracks that were inexplicably left off the original), and call it Angels Advocate. She's hoping that on March 30 it saves her hit-making reputation.
She shouldn't count on it. First of all, it's usually hit albums that are repackaged to increase their life spans. If no one cared about an album the first time, they'll probably care less when excellent songs are ruined to (hopefully) increase their radio potential. Case in point: "Up Out My Face", Imperfect Angel's best song, which has been refashioned into an awkward duet with rapper Nicki Minaj. (What? Missy Elliott, Lil Kim or Eve weren't available?) The cheap-looking hot mess of a video doesn't help.
Mariah, if you're reading, here are a few words of advice:
1. Let fallen Angels lie. Rather than trying to save a flop album, take those extra tracks and release them as an EP. And the next time you work with Timbaland, don't leave the fruits of your labor off the finished product.
2. Fueding with rappers who are bigger than you are is never a good career move. Let bygones be bygones, and kiss and make up with Eminem. Or just ignore him. "Obsessed" was a great song, but no one wants to see you dressed as a guy in your videos.
3. Grow up! The eye fluttering and cutesy sideways-glance thing may have been okay when you were in your twenties, but you're 40 now. Strike a new pose!
4. When in doubt, go Gaga. I hear she'll do anything. Maybe she'll even help give your sagging chart fortunes a boost. (True/Slant)
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