We must have been good this year, because Mariah Carey will soon be gifting us with three new movies, which will screen on the Hallmark Channel beginning in 2017. The renewed partnership between Mimi and Hallmark is a boon to all of us who love her, because the combination previously gave us treasures like Mariah Carey's Merriest Christmas and A Christmas Melody. What will the collaboration bring? Here are our totally unsolicited dream ideas for the project.
"The Butterfly Room"
Why would this make a good movie? In the legendary, bar-setting Mariah Carey episode of Cribs, we were introduced to The Butterfly Room, a spare bedroom in the songbird's Tribeca pad that's decorated in a flower and butterfly print. While showing us around the wondrous space, Mariah pulled out several books made by fans, and said that the mementos had helped her out during a time when she wasn't "quite so very happy". The unforgettable moment reminded us of the essential vulnerability and fragility of our idols, even the unassailable Mariah, in her many-roomed ivory tower.
What's the concept? Now that Mariah is extra busy filming her new reality show and preparing for her wedding to James Packer, The Butterfly Room lies dormant for much of the year. That is, until Angie Lee, one of Mariah's biggest fans, opens her closet door and discovers that her unassuming storage solution is actually a secret portal to The Butterfly Room. To Angie's astonishment, there are many magical creatures living in the room, including a faun, a majestic lion, and an MTV producer who never actually left the apartment after filming the Cribs in 2002.
"Glitter 7"
Why would this make a good movie? Since Glitter was released in 2001, it has become something of a punching bag. With a 7% rating on Rotten Tomatoes, the rags-to-riches tale might be regarded by some as a blip in Mariah's illustrious career. However, the movie holds a spot in fans' hearts as a kind of ne plus ultra of early aughts kitsch. If you are for real, you actually love Mariah more because of this movie, not less.
What's the concept? Since so much time has elapsed since the original Glitter came out, the movie will be called Glitter 7. Despite the fact that there is no such thing as Glitter 2, or, for that matter, 3, 4, 5, or 6, the advanced numbering of this new iteration of Glitter will make you curious about what has been happening in the soapy world of burgeoning singers and their love affairs since you last heard about it (much like the time you discovered there were actually eight Fast and the Furious movies). But it doesn't really matter what happens in the actual movie.
"Candy Cushnip's Christmas"
Why would this make a good movie? Candy Cushnip is the name of a bit part character Mariah played in a 2002 episode of Ally McBeal. Candy was the hapless victim of a dating service that promised her a partner, but instead threw several unworthy men at the unsuspecting lass. The episode also poked fun at Mariah's diva reputation, by incorporating the fact that poor Candy loved the spotlight, and always travelled with her own spotlight and technician. "It's an esteem device," protested sweet Candy. We believe you, C!
What's the concept? Combining Mariah's well-documented love for Christmas with this golden character who has so far languished in the depths of TV history, Candy Cushnip's Christmas would be a romantic comedy about a young woman who wants to find love but just can't. After hiring a Patti Stanger-like dating aficionado, who can't find her a perfect match, Candy still hasn't found the one. But then, as her Christmas present, Santa grants her membership to the Raya dating app, and Candy matches happily with a twice-removed Kennedy.
(Elle)
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